Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Drifting

I serve a God who is immeasureably gracious and good. I have an exceptional family, an attentive husband, and precious children. We're in good health, the business is better than it's ever been, and blessings have been pouring out on us lately. I have every reason in the world to be joyful and intentional.

So why am I so lethargic? Apathetic. Disinterested. Blah.

Ever go through those phases where you just don't care?

9 comments:

Granny said...

Praying for you tonight.

Kristen & Dave said...

Oh Stephanie, been there. I'm sure anything I can say you already have told yourself, since I know you're a smart girl. In those hard days, communion is the only remedy for me. By the hour, the minute, communing with Him, even in unconventional ways (i.e.--"Mommy, who are talking to??). He already knows, but tell Him anyway.

Anonymous said...

Dear Friend,
You sound so tired, maybe the "baby blues". TIred mother syndrome. Press on, just think of the rewards God has for you!! YOu hav emany friends knowing what it is like to have a busy life like you do!
Mindy M.
Tulsa, OK

Grandfather said...

I think this may be a trait that increases with each American generation.

As Scripture (especially Proverbs and Ecclesiastes) makes clear, there is nothing new under the sun, and all of life may be seen -- from a fleshly or selfish perspective -- as vanity and striving after the wind. Pointless.

You live, you die. So what?

Many days can be like that, too; in the midst of our chores (which are of course nothing compared with what earlier generations had to bear) life can appear pointless under the sun. It is on those days especially, that we must rely upon the Holy Spirit.

The Counselor will not always give us what we want, either. The irony of it is: if "what we want" is the whole problem (the natural human trait of self-absorption) then the solution is to NOT get more of it. Not just now, anyway.

If our fulfillment is TRULY in Him, then it is not in us; not in how we feel or what we think of things, but how HE is being served.

Imagine: all eternity will be spent in this mode, and we are told that it will be glorious. So if we have faith to believe in Him in the first place, then all the rest must follow.

In the "blahs", we cheer for our Captain and King. Soon enough, the self-absorption has nothing to feed on, and it goes away.

It's not about me; it's about Him. Whether or not I can grasp the alien physics and psychology, it operates on the universe (me included). Feelings are really immaterial; when we do our "duty", the feelings follow.

A rum thing, but there it is.

Kim C. said...

I wanted to make a crack about the possibility of pregnancy, but maybe that wouldn't be so funny.
So I'll just ask you this: would you like a Handy Dandy Helper this week? I have several to spare these days...we could even send a loaner puppy to help lift spirits. You'd be amazed at what a puppy will do for you, and how often do you get to send them back while they're still cute and little?
:)

Krista said...

I love you and I am praying for you. :)

Kelly said...

Hi Stephanie,

I stumbled upon your blog from Kim C.'s blog and have enjoyed reading about your family and your adventures. I just wanted to take a minute to encourage you. To remind you that there's nothing wrong with taking some extra time for yourself or reaching out to those who around you. I will be praying for this fog to lift and for you to be walking in the Son once again.

Blessings

Hofwoman said...

Love you too Steph . . . I pray He'll give you joy -

Lora said...

Please know you do not hold the monopoly on this, many experience the same thing. Now it is time to take advantage of well experienced in this area to help you through it. Hold on and we will be praying for you also.